Soundbite snark. Pick one. Pick 'em all.

There's a webcomics site on which women and girls will find things to read! There's a line of girl's books! OMG! DC made it to the 21st century (following in the wake of GirlAMatic.com and Viz) only nearly a decade in!

ETA: Oh, lolcomics, you are like P.O.O.P.: you never let us down!



And it's called Zuda. Whatever that means.

ETA: DC, carrying on its fine tradition of naming comics lines with names already used (Femme Noir, Minx), has used the name of a artist , ZUDA, as the name of its webcomics line. At least this time its not the name of an existing comic.
(ETA: That was pointed out by Matt M. at The Beat. Sorry about neglecting to link, Matt!)

I bet the name "Zuda" came from the same Alloy Scrabble tile bag as Jetix and Meguzi. Considering that DC's girl's line (inspired by Shelley Bond seeing girls reading manga and then deciding to do books NOTHING LIKE MANGA) was named "Minx," we should all be grateful Zuda isn't called "Smeg."



What Heidi calls the punditocracy is saying things much like what I said about TokyoPop contracts well over two years ago. To wit: this smells, and creators should beware. If you think this is a great opportunity, and all the other wah-wah I heard about TP two years ago, have fun. Don't try to defend it here.

You know, I think I'm pretty funny, but the Zuda fact sheet is much, much funnier. Let's look, shall we?

"Zuda Comics will be all-new, original comics made specifically for the web."
It's new! These comicwebbies!

"Not only that, but the majority of comics we publish will be selected by the Zuda community...The one you guys like the best is the one we'll sign up for a one-year contract."
Hey, DC! Does this mean you'll poach from Zuda, your own site, instead of from Oni and Slave Labor and other establlished webcomcis sites? Are you in a plan like TokyoPop, which is to find hungry, ignorant and in-denial creators looking for their Big Break?
How is it that Platinum and TP beat you to the "have a contest in the barn and get a winner so excited about validation they'll pretend they don't see the mouse print " bandwagon?"

"We're giving away postcards at the San Diego Comic Con in order to make a giant collaborative Web Comic."
I bet the "by submitting, you give us all rights throughout the known universe in all forms of media current or yet to be created" boilerplate on the reverse of that  postcard  is smaller than the type on the back of a lottery ticket.



"We're using a lot of open source technologies to build the final Zuda Comics site. That's just how we roll."
I'll be over here, in the corner, in a fetal position, seeing how long I laugh before that rib I cracked at APE in 2004 breaks again.

" Every artist needs to work on a page, even if it's a digital one. Yeah, we weren't sure just what that meant either"

Maybe you should've launched when you had a site, then.

 "...so we did a lot of work to figure that out. Our page had to work on screen and, eventually, in print and it had to work for single panels, strips and pages. [Dave] came up with this complex formula that resulted in an aspect ratio that worked for everything - 4:3. Turns out, it's an industry standard. "
The? Fuck?
You know, there was a panel on webcomics in 1997 at the long-gone pro/Con. Scott McCloud hosted it. Attending this panel were any number of comics pros, including Kurt Busiek and Chris Claremont. Claremont had cast himself in the role of naysayer,  again and again giving reasons webcomics wouldn't work. He would write down his statements on a legal pad, and shout them out when there was an opportunity.
The panel eventually ended, and I met up with Kurt and Ann Busiek outside, and discussed Claremont's combativeness. Kurt had been reading Claremont's legal pad over his shoulder.
"He didn't get to my favorite point," said Kurt.
"What was that?" I asked.
"'Comics pages wrong size for computer screen.'"

"Every artist needs to work on a page, even if it's a digital one. Yeah, we weren't sure just what that meant either so we did a lot of work to figure that out."
This is dissembling. Gosh-darn we're new here too dissembling. Gosh-darn we're you're buddies we'd never ask you to sign away anything that'd hurt ya! We're pals! Here, have a few pomegranate seeds!



"You make the web comics and send them to us for publication."
This whole Zuda things smells of "Webcomics! How hard could it be to run an electronic slushpile? How hard can it be to run a webcomics site? There's no print prep, people submit, the readers 'vet,' we sit back and pick what we want."
How hard are webcomics sites to run? I can answer that, having launched a site (amongst great hostility to the idea of a girl- and woman-friendly portal) and running it for two years: very hard, if you want the work to appear, you want creators who can sustain over a period of time, you can deal with the anger of being poached and creators forgetting they started with you, the editor's work to be transparent, and the reader's experience seamless.
Ask Warren Ellis. Rocket Pirates, anyone?

Back when Summer was a baby, I was approached by an editor of Mondo 2000 at a party. Fresh off a hit of wacky tabaccy, she asked me me if I was interested in doing a manga for Mondo.
"What's the pay," I asked.
She answered in a voice constricted and gravelled from smoke, "We...pay in...acclaim."

A final thought, to go with all the warnings: